Lu and I are in a stage of our marriage that my graduate advisor refers to as "the lean years." Dr. V seems to remember this time of his life with fondness -- a mix of research, writing, love, marriage, and childless freedom.
In practical terms, Lu and I are tired, broke grad students with bright -- albeit uncertain -- futures.
With that said, during one conversation with Dr. V, he highlighted two things Lu and I have now that will soon fade: time and energy. I'd like to add a third resource to that list -- research grants.
Between these three benefits of the lean years. Lu and I have defined a new term: the VaConference. (As a budding scholar, I am now free to make up words that even google hasn't seen before.)
Basically, Lu and I look for conferences in our respective fields that we think would be interesting and relevant, and we bring the other person along. Since the conferences are useful to our work, one of us is able to get funding for an airplane ticket, hotel, and meals. Therefore, we only have to pay for the other person's travel, food, and tours.
Since we are both students, the conference attendee does the presentation/poster, networking thing and the non-conference attendee does their personal work for school (or updates a certain blog). We meet up at lunch breaks, in the evenings, and during other downtimes.
Part-vacation and part-conference, the VaConference is certainly not a new concept. We run into other spouses milling around the conference venue, and there are even some kids at welcome receptions and award banquets. Therefore, despite being tired and broke, Lu and I have had five "honeymoons" in our first eight months as newlyweds:
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| Hiking near Deep Creek |
1)
Mini-Moon at Deep Creek Lake, MD (October 2010): The day after the wedding, Lu and I loaded up the car with gifts and leftover wedding paraphernalia and headed to an amazing bed and breakfast on Deep Creek Lake in Maryland. Since we were both sick, this was the perfect way to relax and rejuvenate with reading, hiking, sleeping, etc. Then we checked out Frank Lloyd Wright's
Fallingwater home and stayed at a ski resort in Pennsylvania before finishing our drive back to Michigan.
2)
Official Honeymoon in Costa Rica (February 2011): During Spring Break, Lu and I spent a week exploring Costa Rica. We had an amazing time checking out the beaches, the rainforest, and some city life. Lu tried his hand at boogie boarding, while I lounged and read my Kindle. We visited hot springs, hiked on hanging bridges, and toured a coffee plantation. We slept in, caught up on Grey's Anatomy, ate tons of delicious food, and enjoyed our three magnificent views: the Pacific Ocean in Manuel Antonio, the Arenal Volcano in La Fortuna, and the city of San José from Santa Barbara de Heredia.
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| "The Bean" in Millenium Park |
3)
VaConference in Chicago (April 2011): I presented at a conference in Chicago, and Lu brought some homework to do in our hotel room. Although we were only four hours away from school, it was an entirely new world of restaurants, parks, and shopping. We were also able to catch up with friends and family in the area.
4)
VaConference in Hawaii (May 2011): I presented at a conference in Hawaii, and Lu brought some work from the lab to do at a Starbucks on the beach -- same general theme as the first conference. However, since this was our first time to Hawaii, we scheduled in a tour of the island, spent the evenings on the beach, and ended our trip with a conference-sponsored luau (told you the VaConference thing wasn't our idea).
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| Wearing Lu's World Haptics Conference bag |
5)
VaConference in Istanbul (June 2011): This time, it's Lu's turn to present at a conference. I am currently in the lobby of the
Harbiye Military Museum writing this post, while Lu is upstairs listening to presentations. Yesterday, we had lunch with his advisor and their collaborators, then we chatted with a newly-tenured professor and his wife at the welcome reception in the evening. We're going on a cruise of the Bosphorous Strait (also conference-sponsored) tonight, we're taking a cooking class tomorrow, we're touring the Old City on Saturday, and we have a long layover in Amsterdam on the way home.
Sure, Lu and I could be putting this money in savings, but when will we have the time or opportunity to travel like this again? By "travel like this," I'm thinking in terms of the price we're spending (pretty much half the price of a typical trip), the activities we're doing (not all of them are exactly kid-friendly), and the toll it's taking on our bodies (flying in on Sunday and going to work on Monday with jet-lag).
We've also been extremely responsible with our limited funds. Lu and I planned a cost-effective wedding, and then we combined our bank accounts, updated our life insurance policies, and opened Roth IRAs. We also built up an emergency fund, which we are currently replenishing because we dipped into it after
both of our cars died last month. On a daily basis, we bring our lunches from home, shop the clearance racks, and have a frequent buyer card for every coffee shop in our local area. We're nowhere near the poorhouse; but if we end up there, it's going to be because we traveled the world -- not because we purchased new shoes.
We really want to live our life to the fullest before we have to deal with the responsibility of real jobs, not to mention children. This isn't to say that you can't travel with a career or kids, but the logistics are different and the considerations aren't the same as we have now. Quite frankly, our biggest concern is usually where we should go next and how soon can we get there!
As I look forward to tonight's cruise, I have to admit that Dr. V is right (as usual): the lean years aren't so bad after all.
~* Ash *~
