Many brides grow their hair out before the wedding (and/or get extensions) to have long locks that can be perfectly spiraled or put in some elaborate up-do on the big day. However, within a few months of the "I dos," most women toss out the deep conditioner, take out the weave, and chop off their hair.

Some people describe it as freeing themselves from the stress of the wedding, others say that long hair makes them feel young or immature, and some women just plain like the convenience of short hair.

In my opinion, cutting your hair after the wedding is a lot like binge-eating after an extreme diet. You get sick of obsessing about being perfect, and you just want to be comfortable.

I'm known for being scissor-happy. My hair goes through cycles of growing and cutting. I'll grow my hair past my shoulders,


cut it to not-quite-shoulder-length,


grow it a little bit more again,


get sick of it, and chop it to my chin...



and repeat.



In fact, a few weeks after I graduated college, I cut off almost a foot of hair myself. Yep, I took some scissors into my parents' bathroom and went to work!

Why?

Well, there was the whole "new phase of life" thing. However, I'd also just gotten a cramp in my arm from spending almost two hours drying and straightening my hair -- all to go outside, sweat, and have my curls come right back. Goodbye, straight hair. Hello, pixie-cut curls!



This time, I've decided to do the opposite. I'm going to grow my hair as long as I can tolerate it.

I also got a Keratin treatment to keep my hair strong and healthy during the process. I blogged awhile back about how I was thinking of getting one but was nervous about it. I gave in, and I love it!

It's not the life-changing event that some people say, but I can blow-dry and flat iron my hair in 20-30 minutes flat. It still has body and volume. I even let it air-dry over the weekend, and my hair was mostly straight -- in a good way (i.e. not the damaged, flat relaxer-version of straight).

Over the next 3-5 months, my curls will supposedly return to their full glory. However, given how wonderful this has been so far, I might just keep it up!

All images courtesy of Martin Studio Photography and video by 3 Blind Mice Productions.

After my crazy wedding morning, my sister and I pulled up to the church at 2:15 pm to find... my parents. No bridesmaids, no groomsmen, no hostesses, no coordinators, no makeup artist.

Normally, this would have made me a bit nervous. However, given the morning that I'd had, I didn't even care! I was just happy that I was there myself.

When I walked into the sanctuary, my nerves calmed even more. There was a funeral at the church that morning, so I knew that we might be cutting it close with the decorations. However, everything was beautiful!


After walking around and checking everything out, my bridesmaids started to arrive, then one of my hostesses showed up, and then my make-up artist/Ann Arbor big sister arrived -- soon the church was bustling with activity.

With about an hour until the ceremony, we had to get moving. The first step for me was make-up, and then my sisters, mom, and bridesmaids helped me get dressed:






Then my bridesmaids did their make-up and touching up:





Finally Lu called, and we said a prayer together over the phone:


Confession: I actually saw Lu before the ceremony. The door to the bridal lounge kept opening and closing as parents, coordinators, aunts, bridesmaids, etc. went in and out. He says that he didn't see me, but I could've sworn that we made eye contact for a millisecond. At that point we locked the door, and strictly limited who could come in/leave out.

Before I knew it, the coordinators were calling everyone out to line up. I hurried my make-up artist out of the door, so she wouldn't miss the entrance.

Then I was alone, such a surreal moment to go from a flurry of activity to silence. It's so weird to know that your wedding -- what you've prayed for, painstakingly planned, and dreamed about is going on in the next room. I took a few deep breaths, did some reflection, got teary-eyed, stopped reflecting, got bored, started pacing, heard a knock on the door, got ready to walk out, but it still wasn't time for me to go. Then I debated on making one last trip to the restroom, decided against it, and then the real knock came....

While I was doing my dressing/praying/breathing/pacing/reflecting, this is what was going on outside the bridal lounge:



Video also found at http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AEd2MMaWS7A.

Ahh, my wedding day... over four weeks ago?! Wow. It's definitely time to give you a play-by-play update about the big day.

We've got photos, videos, and lots of exciting stuff to share; but for this post, let's stick to the morning of the wedding.

The most important lesson: Anything and everything can happen on your wedding day. Try to schedule as little as possible because there are some things that you just can't plan for... at all!

I woke up in our soon-to-be honeymoon suite at 7:00 am, after getting about 4 hours of sleep. Actually, I woke up at about 6:30 completely full of energy. My hair appointment wasn't until 10:00 pm, and I wasn't scheduled to meet my sister until 9:30. I stayed in bed willing myself to go back to sleep, but I gave up.

Ms. L and Ms. N (who slept over along with Ms. M, Ms. P, and Ms. S) had to get going at 8:00 am, so I figured I'd slip in the shower and get ready before they woke up.

This is when things started going downhill.

I ended up dropping my retainer down the hotel sink. I've had these retainers for over a decade with no incident, so this was the last thing I expected. I called in the maintenance man, who had to take apart the sink to rescue my retainers.

By this point everyone was awake, and Ms. N and Ms. L were actually running late. Since I had over an hour to spare, I volunteered to take Ms. N to her hair appointment. I'd come back, eat the fruit and yogurt I'd put in the refrigerator, then go to meet my sister.

However, after driving for about a minute, my check engine light came on. I'd gotten an oil change and my car checked right before I left Michigan, and there were no problems. In fact, the one and only time my check engine light had come on in the past, I drove about two miles before my car ended up sputtering to a stop at a service station.

Sooo... I freaked out, but Ms. N was able to keep me (mostly) calm and helped guide me to a metro station. I dropped her off, and she left assuring me that everything would be okay with my car and her hair appointment. Love that girl!

Then I headed to the Atrium -- Lu and I had planned to leave the reception in my car -- to meet my sister. I told her about my car, and after some debate, we agreed to leave the car there. At this point I also ran into Johann who was setting up everything beautifully for that night... more on that in upcoming posts!

My sister and I headed to my hair appointment, and the beautician told us that she'd be done in an hour. Knowing my deceptively thick and difficult hair, I told my sister to expect it to take at least two hours. The style ended up taking nearly three hours to do -- my hand-molded waves were gorgeous! Ms. S forbade me from saying "finger waves"... even though that's what they are. :-)

With over three hours until the ceremony, my sister and I debated about what to do. We ended up grabbing fast food, and then calling local mechanics. She wanted me to wait until the next day to deal with my car, but I was worried about service stations being open on a Sunday. Besides, I was determined that Lu and I would fully enjoy our honeymoon.

Sure enough, most places were closed the next day; and the one place that was open couldn't promise that it'd be able to get parts if something major was wrong. So we headed back to the Atrium, picked up my car, and dropped it off at the mechanic. Yes, two hours before my wedding ceremony, I was at a mechanic.

Had I planned that? Not at all!... Just like I hadn't planned having my hotel sink taken apart, a three-hour hair appointment, or skipping breakfast and scarfing down Bojangles for lunch. But I'd left enough spare time in my schedule for unexpected emergencies, so I was surprisingly calm.

Besides, with my car as taken care of as possible, I had more important things to worry about... like getting married!

I know that's a strange title for a blog post the day before my wedding, but it's completely accurate.

I probably shouldn't even be blogging the day before the wedding because I'm supposed to be relaxing. However, you guys know me: 1) When do I actually do what I'm "supposed to do" for the wedding?!; and 2) Blogging has kept me calm during this entire process. Why stop now?

Gettin' Fancy
My agenda for today includes getting everything "did," which means manicure, pedicure, facial waxing, body waxing, and a deep conditioning hair mask (with my style, I have NO idea how much gel my stylist will need tomorrow).  Ms. S and Ms. P flew in yesterday, so we're going to go to the nail salon together.

Another comment about what I'm supposed to do: I probably should be going to the spa. However, I'm picky about my eyebrows. I rarely get them done, so I want to make sure that they're right. If Mai (not being sarcastic, that's actually her name) has made me beautiful a dozen times before, then I'm going to stick with her regardless of where she works.

Eating Good
After all of my concern about my dress, I've actually dropped 4 more pounds since my "perfect" fitting a few weeks ago. You guessed it: busy, stressed, not eating. :-/

However, it's kind of cool because my wedding gown is longer now, meaning I was able to trade in my fun orange shoes for some sexy burgundy peep toe pumps that I found three days ago at David's Bridal of all places -- really am starting to get the warm fuzzies for David's.

To make a long story [as] short [as possible], I went to try on my dress for the final time and get my last press, saw the shoes, loved them, but they were and inch taller than the shoes my dress was hemmed for, tried them on anyway, the hem was perfect with the extra few pounds gone, but only two stores in the country had the size/color combo I wanted, one happened to be in Maryland along the route I was driving back, put them on hold Tuesday, went to pick them up on Wednesday, turns out someone had held shoes that had already been purchased, but they had another pair of size 6 beauties in the back, tried them on, they fit wonderfully, and now my shoes look like this:
As trite as this sounds, I think these shoes are a blessing from God. As soon as we picked our wedding colors, I began scouring the internet for burgundy peep toe pumps with no luck. Then I went to David's Bridal after my dress was altered to get a bustle added, and they just happened to get in the exact shoes I've been looking for a week before my wedding, one of the two stores in the country that had my size/color is along my route home, and they had 2 pairs?! That's just too many coincidences for me. I really think God knows how much this day has been weighing on me, and He wanted to give me one last sign that everything -- even my shoes -- will fall into place.

But I digress majorly, today I will be eating. Not a ton of food, but I've dropped almost 10 pounds since my freak out in July without really trying that hard.... I was supposed to lose no more than 5 pounds. Oops. At least the shoes were a super bonus!

Feeling Frogs
Several people have asked me if I'm excited about the wedding, so I made up a metaphor for how I feel. When Lu and I first started dating, I felt butterflies. Constant flutters in my stomach whenever I saw him, talked about him, or even thought about him. Lu gave me butterflies like no man ever had in my life.

Now that it's the day before the wedding, the butterflies have been replaced by frogs. Instead of a constant flutter, I get random leaps of excitement.

Since I know that God wants this marriage to happen and Lu and I are meant to be, I'm not nervous. I'm just hanging out on my lily pad perfectly calm, and then someone will say something like, "Do you realize that you'll be Mrs. Brown in less than 48 hours? Hours?!" Then I'll do a happy dance.

Literally.

My dance is more like this spastic, shoulder-jerk-foot-shuffle-hip-thrust-jazz-hands reaction that my body has taken to busting out with whenever it really hits me that the wedding is here.... As long as I don't do that tomorrow at the altar (in my gorgeous shoes), I'll be fine!

And this really is my last pre-wedding post. A. Reid is signing off forever.... Catch you next time as Mrs. Brown!

Planning a vintage-themed wedding has been a lot of fun. I've really enjoyed picking out the attire, décor, cake, etc. However, I had been putting one thing on the back burner: my hair.

After a discouraging week of style after style, I just kinda put it off as something that I'd figure out "later." Well, later is here now!

I thought about wearing my hair up, down, half-up/half-down, curled, straight, sleek. I finally decided to try something that I never, ever thought I'd do in my life: finger waves.

Yes, that's right. I said I'm putting my hair in finger waves. Although, this may bring back scary flashbacks of the early-90s, this is not the look I'm going for. I'm thinking back to the 1940s with softer curls.

What my hair will NOT look like!

After scouring the internet, I decided that I want a style that looks kind of like these:





I even found a stylist with a salon that's half a mile from the church who can do it! I'm going to skip the trial because I'm getting into town so close to the wedding date.

Although a trial would be ideal, with only a few days before the wedding, I don't really see the point. If the style comes out great, then it was a waste of time. If it comes out horrible, then I'll be extra-stressed and have no other options. (If it doesn't work out the day of, then I'm going to pull it back into a simple, classic chignon.)

With all the lingerie and Victoria's Secret gift cards that I got at my bridal shower, I've seriously been considering having a boudoir shoot for Lu.

Boudoir photography is essentially the bridal version of Glamour Shots. (Yes, as in "the" Glamour Shots. Apparently, they still exist but have nixed the feather boas!)

You take your average bride, add makeup, fluff her hair, and then take coquette-ish pictures of the newly-minted, bombshell in lingerie. After the shoot, the photos are retouched and put into a nice album or hardcover book.

From normal to "wow" by photographer Ellen Ho: www.hong-photography.com

Boudoir photography is meant to be fun, sexy, and flirty. The photographers are skilled to make you feel comfortable and look gorgeous -- not trashy or slutty. At $200-1000+ for a photo shoot and an album, you certainly pay for the entire glamour experience.  

It's become so popular, that it's now a trend for women to give their grooms pictures as a wedding present. Since our photography package comes with a free engagement session that we aren't using, I contemplated having a boudoir session instead.

Bridal Boudoir by Pussycat Pinups: www.pussycatpinups.com

I've decided that a boudoir book is much more appropriate for our first-year anniversary for the following reasons:

Now that I have my dress and my veils, I need to decide what I'm going to do with my hair. I have really thick, shoulder-length, curly hair.

The great thing about my hair is that it's really versatile. In the last week (yep, 7 days), my hair has gone from this:

Wild and Fun

....to this:

Natural but a lil' more tame

... to this:

A pretty roller set

... to this:

Sleek bun

 to this!

Straight with a few curls at the end

While it might seem that I have a lot of options for the wedding, the problem is that my hair can easily turn into this:

NOOOOO!

It might seem that the easiest option is to wear my hair up and/or back the day of the wedding, but that doesn't tame the frizzies either. I could easily end up with a crown of flyaways. *sigh*

I've considered getting a Keratin smoothing treatment before the wedding. The Keratin treatment relaxes the curl, conditions the hair (no crazy chemicals), and will leave my hair frizz-free, silky,  shiny, and almost straight. The Keratin treatment is supposed to work for all races, ethnicities, and hair types. The best part? In 4-6 months, I'll have my curls back!

Latina hair before and after a Keratin treatment

My only worry is that the Keratin treatment is new and seems too good to be true. I've researched it online and talked to people who've had it done.

A friend-of-a-friend told me, "It literally changed my life. I can go to the gym, I can go swimming, and I don't have to worry about my hair. It's not like a regular relaxer at all.... I can tell you some crazy stories about those! But I really have nothing negative to say about the Keratin treatment."

Then I looked online and saw horror stories about people who lost hair using the treatment -- as in hair falling out. I'm not sure if these people had it done professionally or not, but it's still scary.

With six weeks before the wedding, I'm not sure if I want to make any drastic changes. At the same time, I don't want to turn into a frizzball before the reception. Decisions, decisions.....

If you haven't figured it out by now, our goal for the wedding is to make things as fun and comfortable as possible without totally breaking tradition. As I get together my wedding beauty plan, I've realized that there are some things about beauty that are neither fun nor comfortable.

All of the following are "normal" for weddings and special occasions in general, but I really just can't decide which ones are worth doing:


1) Facials: Pretty mild and common, except for one part: extractions. An extraction is basically when a dermatologist, or aesthetician, pops your pimples with a sharp, metal tool. It's not "supposed" to be painful, but it's definitely not pleasant.




2) False Eyelashes: Again, pretty mild and common. However, applying fake eyelashes requires some skill because you actually glue the lashes as close to the edge of your eye as you can. After all, you want them to blend in with your real ones.  Some people love false eyelashes and swear that they're the only way for your lashes to "show up" in pictures.

That may be true, but with my tendency to rub, pluck, and cry, wearing mascara alone will be tricky enough on my wedding day. I don't need to worry about some foreign substance glued to my eyelids.




4) Teeth Bleaching: I'm a coffee drinker. (Aahhh, just another side effect of graduate school.) While my teeth are fairly white, they're not as sparkly as they used to be a few years ago, and I'm tempted to go to the dentist and get my teeth bleached before the big day.

Nonetheless, the several hundred dollar price and horror stories of tooth sensitivity after the procedure have kept me away.  Teeth are meant to chew food. If it hurts to chew, then something's not right!  Also, note that I used the term "bleaching." You may be more familiar with "whitening," but professionals oftentimes use real bleach to make your teeth shine beyond humanly possible. I think I'll pass.

There are other alternatives, such as take-home kits from the dentist ($100-250) or even at-home kits from the drugstore (about $20). These don't use bleach to whiten, but instead remove stains from your teeth to restore their natural color. That sounds right up my alley.

And if all else fails, nothing "whitens" my teeth faster than putting on red lipstick.

5) Body Shapers: Corsets, girdles, and now "body shapers." Women are always looking for ways to alter what God (and McDonalds) gave them. Go into any lingerie store or bridal boutique and they have tons of options to push up the breasts, cinch the waist, flatten the tummy, and even lift the booty.

There are two problems with these: 1) When you take it off, you still have your real body underneath; and 2) They're notoriously uncomfortable. Even the people who like them, say that wearing them isn't natural. One of my friends even told me, "They make you look amazing! Any discomfort you feel is gone when you realize how great you look. Besides, you just get used to not fully breathing."

HUH?!... Oh, wait. I guess it's kinda like you get used to eating without chewing once your teeth are bleached.


My mind also flashes back to Mrs. R's wedding day when all she wanted to do at the end of the night was get her bustier off. (Side note: Am I the only one who thinks it's hilarious that "boo-stee-ay" is spelled the same as "busty-er"?)

Mrs. R is thin. There wasn't a whole lot being cinched in, but the first thing she did when it was off was take a deep breath and thank God. And not in a pagan sort of way, but in an eyes closed, hand raised, mini-prayer.

There are people who argue that the dress "looks better" with something on underneath, and I can see why brides want to believe this: when you put on a shaper, you feel like a whole lot's being sucked in. Sorry to say it, but the difference really isn't that noticeable.

Last month, I bought a shaper, tried it on with my dress, and took a picture. Yes, it was a little smoother than the picture without the shaping, but I wasn't totally convinced. After a month of working out, I tried on the dress without any extra shaping, took a picture, and wouldn't you know it?? I look better now with nothing on than with the shaper a month ago, and I can breathe.

My thoughts? Skip the shaper, not the gym.


6) Waxing: Let's end with a bang (or a yank)! Waxing literally involves pouring a hot, sticky substance on patches of your body and ripping the hair out of your skin from the root. You can wax anywhere on your body that has hair -- yes, anywhere. Owww!

Disclaimer: This post involves "female topics." If you're one of those men (or women) who scowl whenever you see a commercial for birth control or tampons, even if you're watching Oxygen or WEtv, then you should probably stop here.

I remember the day that I found out about birth control pills (BCPs).

I was 15 years old and having the kind of "sick" day that involves a heating pad and half a bottle of Midol. Flipping through the pages of Seventeen, I found an ad about Ortho Tri-cyclen that piqued my interest: Birth control can give you shorter, lighter periods with fewer to no cramps.

Shorter, lighter periods?!

No cramps?!?!?!?


I ran to the kitchen and exclaimed, "Mom! I want to get on birth control!"

Horrified, but always as cool as a cucumber (a trait that I didn't inherit), my mom said, "Okay.... Is there something you want to talk about?"

"Yes!! It can get rid of my cramps. It can make my periods lighter. I hate missing school. It sucks missing cheerleading practice."

"I hate that word -- 'sucks.' Don't say that."

"I know, I know. It's not lady-like. I'm sorry. Anyway, can we please go to the doctor and get a prescription? I'm realllly sick of this period crap."

"I hate 'crap,' too. Sucks, crap, pissed off. So harsh! I don't understand how they became a part of kids' language today. [*shakes her head*].... Well, I think we should go to the library first and look up some more information about the pills. I never took them, but you can also talk to your sister about her experience."

"Cool!"

"Are you sure there's nothing else you want to talk about?"

"Huh?"

*Gives me one of those "Mom" stares.*

"No! Geesh, not everybody's having sex.... You watch too much Lifetime."

"Weelll, most of those movies are based on true stories."

*Pause. Then both of us laugh.*

Fast-forward almost a decade of 4-day periods that came the fourth Wednesday of every month at 7 PM with no cramps, and 24-year old me begins to wonder if my body could use a break from those hormones.

Not only are Lu and I celibate, but just maybe my body had figured out this whole menstrual cycle thing on its own.

So one month, I ignored my reminder to refill my BCP prescription. Then a few weeks later, I took the final pill in my last pack, and that was that.

For the rest of the month, I was nervous. What is a "natural" period like? What if I have cramps that tear me in half? Or worse, what if I have one of those middle school horror stories, and everyone sees my stained white pants?

It actually wasn't that traumatic. One day, about four weeks after taking my last pill, I had a slight headache and was extremely tired. I guzzled down several cups of coffee and nothing was helping. Thinking I was getting sick, I went home and took a nap. I woke up, went to the bathroom, and my period had started.

"Hmmm, well that wasn't so bad."

Thirty-one days later, the same thing happened. Then another thirty-one days, and I was officially on a "cycle."

I began to note the interesting monthly changes in my body:

Week One: Normal Val
Week Two: Normal Val
Week Three: Sensitive but Mostly Normal Val
Week Four: Crying/Angry Val + 3 lbs., a snickers bar, and a few zits
P-Day: Tired Val + Headache

I learned to control the changes, so that they wouldn't affect my life. I drank tons of water, so I wouldn't retain those extra pounds. I did yoga and practiced self-talk to try to control the wave of emotions I would feel during the fourth week.... I would still eat my snickers bar.


As far as the few zits, I used spot treatments for the first month, which helped but dried out my skin. The following month, I created a skincare regimen for the first time in my life, and my face completely rebelled.... By the next month, I had about a dozen blemishes on my face -- fresh zits, almost-healed zits, scars from zits.

When I was an adolescent, I really didn't have problems with acne. Sure, I had the Clean & Clear and Stridex pads, but my face didn't really break out. On top of that, I have dry, sensitive skin. Most products for acne were too harsh for me to use on a daily basis.

By the time I was in high school, I got used to having a few pimples here and there. They lasted a few days and were no big deal. By the time I finished high school, my complexion was flawless... despite the fact that I only used regular Dove soap and Palmer's cocoa butter lotion... only in the morning... sometimes.

Therefore, dealing with acne in my mid-twenties was beyond annoying. After shelling out money on cleanser, toner, and moisturizer, I noticed that my face was softer but still broken out. Frustrated, I did research on various acne treatment systems -- most of which were still too harsh for my dry skin.

What could be causing these breakouts? The change in weather? Stress? Not drinking enough water? More importantly, what could I do to get my face back to normal?!

Like most things people search for in life, I found the answer to my problem when I wasn't looking for it.

After Lu and I got engaged, I knew that I wanted to start birth control about 3-4 months before the wedding. That way, my body could go through any physical and/or emotional adjustments that it needed to before the big day.

My first month back on BCPs, I only had two new pimples. By the second month, most of my old zits had healed. As I begin my third month back on birth control, I only have a few scars from my several months of breakouts.

That's when I remembered the one benefit of birth control that I'd completely forgotten about: BCPs help with mild to moderate acne.

I didn't "outgrow" my acne like I'd assumed. My body just doesn't have crazy hormone surges when I'm taking pills. Like my clockwork periods, my flawless face was a positive side effect of being on birth control!

I'm not suggesting that everyone with acne should run out and get The Pill. There can be side effects, some severe. It's definitely a decision that should be discussed thoroughly with a doctor. Personally, I'm glad that I started using BCPs again... and my face is thankful, too.