All images courtesy of Martin Studio Photography and video by 3 Blind Mice Productions.

After dinner, came the toasts by Lu's best men (his childhood best friend and his college roommate) and my maid and matron of honors (my sisters). I LOVED their toasts! They were the right mix of sentimental and funny, and they each reflected the toaster's personality. Lu and I both felt truly blessed:



Then it was time to party! Well, almost -- starting with the cake-cutting (which was delicious), our toasts (totally didn't think about that, my apologies for the rambling), the garter belt removal (loved Lu's apology to my dad after), bouquet toss (from the balcony -- pretty cool), garter belt hot potato (a unique idea I got from a friend at our crafternoon last month), a special dance with our parents (both married for decades), and then it was time to really get down.









I really liked that pretty much everyone at our reception danced. Lu wanted a live band, but we just couldn't stretch our budget that far. Besides, the Atrium package came with a DJ.


To get people up and moving, we asked him to start with the cheesy songs that everyone knows and enjoys dancing to even if they won't admit it. Soooo, the first song played at our wedding reception was the Electric Slide, followed by the Booty Call, and the Cupid Shuffle. This is when the videographer left, but you'll see that the dance floor was packed! When the DJ switched to more modern music, everyone was already up and stayed that way -- we even had a soul train line.








Overall, our reception was a ton of fun: our candy bar was delicious (and devoured), my second dress was a hit, and we left with just enough time to get back to the hotel room, guzzle a 5-hour energy, and head out to our after party! That's right... the wedding day recap continues!

All images courtesy of Martin Studio Photography and video by 3 Blind Mice Productions.

To continue my video/photo recap of our wedding day, here's what happened after our ceremony.

As a wedding guest (and having not been in a wedding since I was 6 years old), this is always the weird part of the day. You know that the couple is taking pictures and having some one-on-one time, but some people pop up to the reception in 30 minutes while others take two hours!

We had a cocktail hour planned for our guests, but I was adamant that we not take a ton of pictures. I'm not a fan of really posed stuff anyway, so we just took the basics in the church: bridesmaids, groomsmen, family in various combinations in the church. (Note: My FAVORITE part of the video clip below is 1:44-1:47. Love it!)



After the formal pictures, we had some fun! The church had a playground in the back, so Lu and I played around there with the rest of our bridal party joining us.






Ms. L spotted this weird piece of equipment -- not sure how you're supposed to play with it, but we got a really cool picture of our whole bridal party! We also took some pictures in our vintage car before heading over to the reception.







Once we were there, Gary -- the amazing hospitality director at the Atrium at Treetops -- shuttled us upstairs, where he had a plate of appetizers ready for us. We took a few minutes to bask in the after-ceremony glow before getting ready for our glass elevator entrance.

We wanted to break up the formal parts of the reception a bit, so we came in and did our first dance right away then danced with our parents before settling down to a delicious dinner.






Tomorrow's post will be on the after-dinner fun stuff -- toasts, cake-cutting, bouquet toss, garter belt hot potato, and of course dancing!

All images courtesy of Martin Studio Photography and video by 3 Blind Mice Productions.

It's officially been a month -- practically to the hour -- since Lu and I made our marriage covenant. Here's a video of the ceremony:



The first month of marriage has been fun! Romantic, humbling, a bit crazy at times... but what an amazing start to our journey. We each decided to share our top 5 lessons learned. We're sure there will be many, many more to come.

Val's Top 5

5) We have more in common than we thought, but Lu is definitely a guy.

We've bonded over learning to purposely cook lumpy cream of wheat (don't stir) and debating about the "best" Jelly Belly flavor -- fun, little quirks. However, some things I was not expecting from my sophisticated, intelligent, neat husband: he laughs when he passes gas loudly, loves "man" movies (Superbad, really?), and leaves the door open while doing #1 because it would be "rude" to interrupt our conversation. Hmmm, gotta love him.

4) It's easy to slip into "newlywed 15" habits.

Skipping the gym to cuddle for an extra hour, baking cookies and cobblers to make Lu smile, eating dinner at 9 pm, and don't get me started on the tapeworm in Lu's stomach! Eating every two hours may not affect him, but I've started to watch my waistline. So far, so good.

3) You CAN blend two styles -- and two closets -- into one condo.

Our place looks GREAT! Besides the decorating and rearranging, we've scoured home stores for creative storage idea. Everything (almost) has it's own bin, drawer, under-the-bed box, or basket.

2) Going to bed angry is pointless.

When you're not married, you can argue and not talk for a few days, or maybe even just break it off all together. When you're in it for the long-haul, it's not so easy to cut off someone who shares your bed, shower, office, and last name. Communication truly is key. We laughed when our counselors warned us about the "Why can't he/she read my mind?!" problem. It's real.

1) It's amazing knowing that I really have a BFF.

Best friends forever -- one month down, an eternity to go.

Lu's Top 5

5) Celibacy is worth it.

Married sex is amazing (it's a mind, body, spirit trifecta). There's no guilt, shame, or tarnished white robes (lol). Best of all married people openly talk about it -- especially church members! Every book on marriage that we have has at least one chapter devoted to sex, and one book is all about sex completely. Communication is important, but sex is right up there. In fact it's a perfect gauge of how well you communicate.

4) Selflessness is HARD!

You won't realize just how selfish you are until you get married. Praying together helps keep us on the same accord, but it's an adjustment to realize that nothing is about me anymore. It's all about us. Simply stated "I" no longer exist in vocabulary, whereas "us" and "we" get promoted to pronoun status.

3) You will spend more time in Bed, Bath, and Beyond than you ever have in your life.

At first, it was annoying when Val dragged me into Bed Bath and Beyond. Now I find myself looking at specs on humidifiers and researching vacuum cleaners. Don't sleep on the Shark. Yeah, it's purple; but it picks up everything.

2) A happy marriage = A happy wife

I could give you a mathematical proof for this, but it's best learned through experimental observation.

1) Marriage isn't an added responsibility. It's a lifestyle change.

Everything you do, or don't do for that matter, in some way, shape, form or fashion affects your wife and home. There's no clock to punch on this one. You're on call 24-7. No better yet you work the morning, day, night, and graveyard shifts...no holidays, paid leave, or sick leave. You work HR, accounting, marketing, and maintenance. And don't even think about a raise...in fact, it's like putting "return to sender" on your paychecks. Which leads me to best thing about marriage: the benefits. Yeah, you pour out a lot of yourself; but so does she. Why be selfish when there's someone who's willing to be selfless on your behalf? Marriage is like a marathon with no real end; stop focusing on the checkpoints, and enjoy the run.

All images courtesy of Martin Studio Photography and video by 3 Blind Mice Productions.

After my crazy wedding morning, my sister and I pulled up to the church at 2:15 pm to find... my parents. No bridesmaids, no groomsmen, no hostesses, no coordinators, no makeup artist.

Normally, this would have made me a bit nervous. However, given the morning that I'd had, I didn't even care! I was just happy that I was there myself.

When I walked into the sanctuary, my nerves calmed even more. There was a funeral at the church that morning, so I knew that we might be cutting it close with the decorations. However, everything was beautiful!


After walking around and checking everything out, my bridesmaids started to arrive, then one of my hostesses showed up, and then my make-up artist/Ann Arbor big sister arrived -- soon the church was bustling with activity.

With about an hour until the ceremony, we had to get moving. The first step for me was make-up, and then my sisters, mom, and bridesmaids helped me get dressed:






Then my bridesmaids did their make-up and touching up:





Finally Lu called, and we said a prayer together over the phone:


Confession: I actually saw Lu before the ceremony. The door to the bridal lounge kept opening and closing as parents, coordinators, aunts, bridesmaids, etc. went in and out. He says that he didn't see me, but I could've sworn that we made eye contact for a millisecond. At that point we locked the door, and strictly limited who could come in/leave out.

Before I knew it, the coordinators were calling everyone out to line up. I hurried my make-up artist out of the door, so she wouldn't miss the entrance.

Then I was alone, such a surreal moment to go from a flurry of activity to silence. It's so weird to know that your wedding -- what you've prayed for, painstakingly planned, and dreamed about is going on in the next room. I took a few deep breaths, did some reflection, got teary-eyed, stopped reflecting, got bored, started pacing, heard a knock on the door, got ready to walk out, but it still wasn't time for me to go. Then I debated on making one last trip to the restroom, decided against it, and then the real knock came....

While I was doing my dressing/praying/breathing/pacing/reflecting, this is what was going on outside the bridal lounge:



Video also found at http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AEd2MMaWS7A.

Ahh, my wedding day... over four weeks ago?! Wow. It's definitely time to give you a play-by-play update about the big day.

We've got photos, videos, and lots of exciting stuff to share; but for this post, let's stick to the morning of the wedding.

The most important lesson: Anything and everything can happen on your wedding day. Try to schedule as little as possible because there are some things that you just can't plan for... at all!

I woke up in our soon-to-be honeymoon suite at 7:00 am, after getting about 4 hours of sleep. Actually, I woke up at about 6:30 completely full of energy. My hair appointment wasn't until 10:00 pm, and I wasn't scheduled to meet my sister until 9:30. I stayed in bed willing myself to go back to sleep, but I gave up.

Ms. L and Ms. N (who slept over along with Ms. M, Ms. P, and Ms. S) had to get going at 8:00 am, so I figured I'd slip in the shower and get ready before they woke up.

This is when things started going downhill.

I ended up dropping my retainer down the hotel sink. I've had these retainers for over a decade with no incident, so this was the last thing I expected. I called in the maintenance man, who had to take apart the sink to rescue my retainers.

By this point everyone was awake, and Ms. N and Ms. L were actually running late. Since I had over an hour to spare, I volunteered to take Ms. N to her hair appointment. I'd come back, eat the fruit and yogurt I'd put in the refrigerator, then go to meet my sister.

However, after driving for about a minute, my check engine light came on. I'd gotten an oil change and my car checked right before I left Michigan, and there were no problems. In fact, the one and only time my check engine light had come on in the past, I drove about two miles before my car ended up sputtering to a stop at a service station.

Sooo... I freaked out, but Ms. N was able to keep me (mostly) calm and helped guide me to a metro station. I dropped her off, and she left assuring me that everything would be okay with my car and her hair appointment. Love that girl!

Then I headed to the Atrium -- Lu and I had planned to leave the reception in my car -- to meet my sister. I told her about my car, and after some debate, we agreed to leave the car there. At this point I also ran into Johann who was setting up everything beautifully for that night... more on that in upcoming posts!

My sister and I headed to my hair appointment, and the beautician told us that she'd be done in an hour. Knowing my deceptively thick and difficult hair, I told my sister to expect it to take at least two hours. The style ended up taking nearly three hours to do -- my hand-molded waves were gorgeous! Ms. S forbade me from saying "finger waves"... even though that's what they are. :-)

With over three hours until the ceremony, my sister and I debated about what to do. We ended up grabbing fast food, and then calling local mechanics. She wanted me to wait until the next day to deal with my car, but I was worried about service stations being open on a Sunday. Besides, I was determined that Lu and I would fully enjoy our honeymoon.

Sure enough, most places were closed the next day; and the one place that was open couldn't promise that it'd be able to get parts if something major was wrong. So we headed back to the Atrium, picked up my car, and dropped it off at the mechanic. Yes, two hours before my wedding ceremony, I was at a mechanic.

Had I planned that? Not at all!... Just like I hadn't planned having my hotel sink taken apart, a three-hour hair appointment, or skipping breakfast and scarfing down Bojangles for lunch. But I'd left enough spare time in my schedule for unexpected emergencies, so I was surprisingly calm.

Besides, with my car as taken care of as possible, I had more important things to worry about... like getting married!

Lu had class today (with homework due), so while our mini-moon is officially over, I'm still basking in the newlywed glow.

Since we're in the awkward in between stage, some of my posts will be broken into two parts: my real-life updates and wedding recaps. Hopefully, that'll help fill you in on the wedding and stay up-to-date with our marriage.

Real-life Update:
Today, I went to the Social Security office and the DMV to start the name change process, and it was actually fairly painless! I think the key is to go mid-week after the morning rush but before the lunch crowd trickles in because I waited less than 5 minutes at each office.... This means that I'm legally Ashley Reid Brown. Wow!

Time to start the onslaught of legal documentation that needs to be changed, but I'll handle that soon enough. In the meantime, I've got to clean up the house a bit and cook dinner. How domestic of me, right? lol

The reality is that I can't mentally de-stress in a messy house. That means everything needs to be in its place before I can start getting back to my normal routine... which brings me to dinner. I haven't cooked in at least two weeks. I'm sick of take out, microwave dinners, and even going to restaurants. I just want some food from my stove. And leftovers. Yes, I miss leftovers.

Wedding Recap:

While the wedding was amazing, I mentioned that there were several things that I didn't plan for in the days and hours leading up to it. Although, it all worked out in the end, these were some things that made me, Ms. Super-Planner, a bit edgy:

-- Shoe Switch-a-roo: The guys wore really cool black and white spectator shoes for the wedding. However, my sisters decided to change my father's shoes to all black a few days before he picked up his tux... without asking me. Since Lu's dad got black and white shoes, it would've thrown off the whole look. One call to Men's Wearhouse, and it was straightened out.

-- Snarky "Friends": While most people have been extremely understanding about our budget and guest list constraints, I had a few "friends" send me really weird texts along the lines of:

• "Are you getting married this weekend?! My invite must have gotten lost in the mail." [No, I just haven't seen you since 2006 and have only gotten random spam emails from you in the last two years. Therefore, I have no idea what your address is.]
• "Woooow! The wedding's so soon. I can't believe you didn't tell me. I thought we were so close." [If we were, wouldn't we have talked in the last six months??]
• "So I can't come to your wedding anyway, but if I would have been invited, then I would've sent a gift." [Darn! I forgot Bed, Bath, & Beyond required proof of invitation to give a gift! I wonder how our friends and family who got us gifts anyway because they care about us as a couple and are excited about our union got around that?]
• "If you want to invite people who are 'close' to you as a couple, then you shouldn't put so much of your business on Facebook and in your blog. That way people will know their real place in your life." [Whoa. Stalk much?]

Of course, instead of telling people what I really wanted to say, I gave the standard, "We both have big families and are working with a small budget, so we limited our list to people who have played a key role in our development as a couple." Quite frankly, in none of the above situations did the senders even say "Congratulations," so they're lucky they got an explanation at all.

-- Not-so Smarty Had a Party: Lu and I ordered our cake plates through a company called Smarty Had a Party. We received one case of 150 with silver trim and one pack of 15 with gold trim. They overnighted the correct plates the day before the wedding... which means that we didn't get them until everyone had already left for the ceremony the day of.  I really appreciated their effort, but the company called me FOUR times the day before our wedding to apologize. I had bigger concerns than cake plates!

-- HIV Testing at the Church: When I went to show Ms. P and Ms. S the church, we found out that the church was having HIV testing at the same day/time as the wedding. I'm all for knowing your status, but "Are you here for the wedding or for testing?" is an awkward question for guests!

-- T-Bone Scare (not the steak): Ms. P, Ms. S, and I almost got into a potentially fatal car accident a few hours before the rehearsal dinner when a teen driver decided to run a stop sign. I thank God for my quick instincts and empty lane beside me on the road because we were inches away from a serious accident.

-- Green Cake?!: Our rehearsal dinner cake was supposed to represent Spelman, Morehouse, and the University of Michigan. When we discussed it with the baker, she talked about having the symbols for Spelman and Morehouse with little "M"s around the sides for Michigan..... Instead, we got a football cake. I don't know what happened, or if she just took the "groom's cake" idea a little too far, but we were not expecting a football field at our rehearsal dinner! (Sorry hardcore Michigan fans.) It tasted delicious, and our wedding cake was gorgeous -- and elegant -- the next day. However, Ms. L had to step in and calm me down when I saw that green cake. 


-- Rehearsal Smackdown: Okay, so that's a little misleading. The church came with a coordinator, and we had two directors to make sure all of the behind-the-scenes things ran smoothly.  On the day of the rehearsal, there were a few debates about how things should be done and why -- who stands where, who walks when, etc.. However, it all turned out great in the end.

-- Bachelor/Bachelorette Party Rules Broken: Lu went to a club with the guys and had a bit too much to drink. My girls got me a stripper, complete with the police officer outfit.... And to protect the innocent, all other details on both ends will be private!

-- Check Engine... Five Hours Before the Wedding: My car's check engine light has only come on once, and the car literally conked out on me in the parking lot of the mechanic's office. Therefore, when the light came on the morning of my wedding, while taking Ms. N to her hair appointment, I freaked. We got lost getting to the Metro station, I was almost late getting my hair done, and I was sitting at the mechanic two hours before the ceremony not knowing whether we'd be able to start our honeymoon on Sunday or not.

But through it all, God is good.... The truth is that no matter how much planning you do, unexpected things will happen. However, knowing the way that things are "supposed to be" and having everything organized will enable you to get through the potentially-stressful times with a smile on your face.

Lu and I are back from our mini-moon and easing back into our lives as husband and wife.

While we're waiting for our official pictures to post (and the unofficial ones -- c'mon Facebook friends, lol), I'll give you the rundown of the wedding from our perspective.

Bottom Line: The wedding ceremony, reception, and after party were perfect! I had an absolute blast, and it was better than I'd even imagined. :-)

Yay! (Self-explanatory)

.... Now with that said, there were a bunch of things that happened pre-wedding that I wasn't expecting. (I'll post about those tomorrow-ish.) Nonetheless, the day of -- well, more like from 2:30 pm and on -- was amazing.

The craziest part was that with all of the planning and coordinating, we didn't even get to see a lot of the things that we'd put together!

Guests Arrival? No idea if anyone had problems finding the church or who came late. Although the wedding started on time -- yes, it IS possible -- so we apparently didn't have too many people lingering around.

Lu's arrival. Note my father blocking the door to my room.

Ceremony? I was stuck in the bridal lounge until I walked down the aisle.

Cocktail Hour? We spent this time taking pictures, so people were seated when we made our entrance.

A few of our post-ceremony pictures.

Reception Set-up? People had already put purses on the tables and napkins in their lap. It still looked beautiful overall, so I'm sure that it was gorgeous at the beginning of the night.

Candy bar? Almost demolished by the time we got to the reception.

First Dance as husband and wife.

Clean-up? I think we got all of our gifts and personal items, so I'm assuming that went okay also!

After the after party? Lu and I caught the party bus back to the hotel about an hour early -- along with about 6-7 other guests. Although I've heard some pretty interesting stories about what went on during/after the second return trip, all of our family and friends are alive and well... and I guess that's all that matters!