Planning a vintage-themed wedding has been a lot of fun. I've really enjoyed picking out the attire, décor, cake, etc. However, I had been putting one thing on the back burner: my hair.

After a discouraging week of style after style, I just kinda put it off as something that I'd figure out "later." Well, later is here now!

I thought about wearing my hair up, down, half-up/half-down, curled, straight, sleek. I finally decided to try something that I never, ever thought I'd do in my life: finger waves.

Yes, that's right. I said I'm putting my hair in finger waves. Although, this may bring back scary flashbacks of the early-90s, this is not the look I'm going for. I'm thinking back to the 1940s with softer curls.

What my hair will NOT look like!

After scouring the internet, I decided that I want a style that looks kind of like these:





I even found a stylist with a salon that's half a mile from the church who can do it! I'm going to skip the trial because I'm getting into town so close to the wedding date.

Although a trial would be ideal, with only a few days before the wedding, I don't really see the point. If the style comes out great, then it was a waste of time. If it comes out horrible, then I'll be extra-stressed and have no other options. (If it doesn't work out the day of, then I'm going to pull it back into a simple, classic chignon.)

Today's my 26th birthday!! :-)

My alter ego has blond hair and likes the color red -- a lot.

Every year, I try to plan something special. Whether it be a speakeasy-themed murder mystery party, a pole/lap/belly dancing "alter-ego" night with friends, or a dessert and game night, I like to celebrate.

This year, I told myself I wasn't going to do anything!

The wedding has me all-planned-out, so I was going to sit on my butt, eat some cake, and sleep. Ms. P had a fantastic birthday party on Friday, so I used that as my "celebration" time. On top of that, cheerleading practice was canceled, so I didn't have to meet my girls at the high school.

The day was shaping up to be full of sloth and gluttony.... That's no longer the case.

I'm in my office collecting money for MLK Ski Weekend for the Students of Color of Rackham. (I'm one of the co-social chairs.) Since nobody's stopped by yet, I'm using this time to get some final wedding planning emails and confirmations sent out.

Then the day gets exciting. On top of getting me my favorite flowers this morning -- sunflowers, lilies, and gerbera daisies, Lu arranged for me to get a massage at 3:30, and we're going to dinner at Real Seafood Company at 7:30.  I'm so excited to try their new fall menu: sweet potato gnocchi with jumbo lump crab followed by pumpkin cheesecake with a praline topping for dessert. My mouth is literally watering!

In between, I'm going to get my eyebrows threaded, a manicure, and as much free stuff as I can. Yes, free stuff. Ann Arbor has a ton of birthday deals -- including food, drinks, coffee, and desert. My goals for the day are to get bubble tea, coffee, a cupcake (Ms. L also made me a delicious 3-layer chocolate cake), and of course dinner with Lu.

Not quite the sit on my butt and veg out birthday I had [not] planned, but what better birthday gifts are there than productivity, beautification, relaxation, and delicious food?

Now that Lu and I have figured out almost all of the details of the wedding, we only have a few more tasks left. One of these is more complicated than I expected: the seating chart.

On the surface, it's pretty easy. Most guests fall under a certain "heading": parents and grandparents, bridal party, extended family, church family, friends from college, friends from grad school, etc.

However, not all of these groups break into neat tables of 8 and 9 (the number of seats at each table). Then on top of that, there's the additional complication of how the room is set-up.

Should we put our friends closest to the dance floor? Should our elderly guests sit in front of or behind our extended family? Should guests with wheelchairs or canes be more comfortable on the aisle or away from one? Should the older kids sit with their parents or get a table of their own? What do we do with our parents' friends?

Then after we get that finished, we have to think of a way to display it all. Since we're not doing place cards, I'm in favor of a really pretty chart arranged by last name. It's another way to bring in our colors without stressing the hostesses out with passing out escort cards.

However, you do have to put in time to create something nice like this:

Pretty, simple, organized. I like it!

We'll see how crafty I feel in the next few weeks.

I had my final dress fitting today, and my dress fits like a glove.... No pinching, no sucking in, and no spanx!!

The 30-minute pinning was worth it for the hem. My orange shoes peek out just a bit when I walk, but you can't see them at all when I'm standing still (which I'm sure my mother and mother-in-law will be happy about). Also, because of the hem, the train looks a bit longer -- an unexpected bonus.

This is great news for another reason: I've decided to wear my ceremony dress the entire day. Lu and I have been slacking on our swing dancing, so I don't need the shorter dress anymore. (I sold it on Craigslist a few days ago.) It was cute, but I'm nowhere near as in love with it as I am with my wedding dress.

BUT there is another twist (c'mon, you guys should expect this by now): Since we're doing an after-party, I got a new, sexy getaway dress that I'm going to slip into right before our final dance. It looks exactly like the dress below, but it's shorter -- just above the knee.



It's a BCBG dress and, even on clearance, was pricier than my wedding dress (well, that actually wasn't too hard)! However, it was so beautiful and perfect for me to party in on my first night as a newlywed. :-)

After all of the worrying about creating and revising a guest list, Lu and I will have a total of 157 guests at our reception on October 16th -- only five guests over our venue's "ideal" number!

The invitation and RSVP process wasn't all that bad. According to the Bridal Association of America's Wedding Report, the average couple spends approximately $659 on invitations and reply cards -- not including reception cards, direction cards, save-the-dates, or postage. With a little planning and creativity, Lu and I were able to spend 77% less than the average couple for everything.

We used 40% off coupons from Michaels to purchase fun, orange invitation kits (that included the invitations, ribbon for decorative bows, envelopes, and response cards) for $45, and we spent $30 on a new ink cartridge for the printer. Total cost of supplies: $75.

Our invitations.

We also included a magnet that we printed through Vistaprint that directed guests to our website for more information and to RSVP. Since we have guests traveling to our wedding from all parts of the country, we thought it would be more convenient for guests to have all of our wedding information at their fingertips in one location.

Vistaprint offered us 100 free magnets and 140 return address labels for free. The return labels did double-duty for both the outside of the invitation and as the mailing label on the response card envelope. One trick: We had to order 140 "free" labels twice to have enough. If we'd ordered 280 labels at once, they would have charged us $9.99 -- definitely still a discount, but free is even better.

Total cost for magnets and labels: $30.

All of the pieces of our invitation. Ready for assembly!

Then we had to figure out what to do about addressing our envelopes. Technically, envelopes are supposed to be hand-written; but neither Lu, I, nor our local bridal party had the time, energy, or penmanship for that. And hiring a calligrapher? At $4/envelope, we quickly nixed that option!

 We considered using mailing labels, but white didn't look good on the ivory envelope and the clear labels were too shiny for our taste. Instead, we just converted our address list on our website to a spreadsheet, and used used the mail merge feature in Microsoft Word to print directly on the envelope in a pretty font.

Lu printing envelopes.

We opted not to use:

• separate reception cards. We printed the address of the reception on the invitation.
• direction cards. We're going to print directions on the back of our ceremony programs, so people don't lose or forget them.
• an inner envelope. We addressed the outer envelopes appropriate and specified how many guests we were inviting on the reply cards (i.e. "We have reserved 2 seats in your honor.")
• stamps on most of our return envelopes. Although we included response card envelopes in all of the invitations, we encouraged guests to RSVP online and only included stamps for our older, more traditional guests.

In addition to saving us the hassle of printing these items, by not including them with our invitation, we were able to save money on postage. Many wedding invitations are too heavy for just one stamp, however we weighed ours and were good to go! Total cost for postage to finish off envelopes: $50. 

Grand total for all of our invitations: $155.... $504 less than the average couple!

There were certainly a lot of people that Lu and I were not able to invite that are close to us as individuals, so sending out invitations was bittersweet. However, we definitely stand by our decision to invite those that have impacted our relationship as a couple.

And you know what? We also didn't have nearly as much drama as we expected with the RSVP process.

Apparently, there were a few "I wonder why I didn't get my invitation yet" remarks. (I only heard about these conversations second-hand, so I'm not sure how common they were.) However, the majority of people were really understanding of our big families/small budget/not starting our marriage in debt situation.


We also didn't have to chase down many people for their responses. The majority of guests took advantage of our online RSVP option, which also saved us tons of time.  Even those last-day stragglers were able to respond in a timely fashion.

There were a few guests that asked if they could add a plus one to their invitation and/or bring a teenager to the "Adult Reception." It was tight,  but we were able to accommodate everyone in the end.

Despite all of my nervousness over the last several months about the guest list, I'm really glad that things ended up the way they did. We didn't lose any friends, end up disowned by any family members, and aren't breaking the fire code of our reception venue. (Yes, all of these have happened to people and were valid concerns for us.)

We will have to squeeze in 9 people at a few tables to maintain the size of the dance floor, but this is just one more worry that's no longer lingering in the back of my mind.

With all the lingerie and Victoria's Secret gift cards that I got at my bridal shower, I've seriously been considering having a boudoir shoot for Lu.

Boudoir photography is essentially the bridal version of Glamour Shots. (Yes, as in "the" Glamour Shots. Apparently, they still exist but have nixed the feather boas!)

You take your average bride, add makeup, fluff her hair, and then take coquette-ish pictures of the newly-minted, bombshell in lingerie. After the shoot, the photos are retouched and put into a nice album or hardcover book.

From normal to "wow" by photographer Ellen Ho: www.hong-photography.com

Boudoir photography is meant to be fun, sexy, and flirty. The photographers are skilled to make you feel comfortable and look gorgeous -- not trashy or slutty. At $200-1000+ for a photo shoot and an album, you certainly pay for the entire glamour experience.  

It's become so popular, that it's now a trend for women to give their grooms pictures as a wedding present. Since our photography package comes with a free engagement session that we aren't using, I contemplated having a boudoir session instead.

Bridal Boudoir by Pussycat Pinups: www.pussycatpinups.com

I've decided that a boudoir book is much more appropriate for our first-year anniversary for the following reasons:

I'm scheduled to pick up my wedding dress in a few days, and I'm pleased to report that I've lost four pounds and 2 1/2 inches since my first fitting a few weeks ago!

These are my two "secrets" (or you can just watch the MadTV clip for the basic summary):




1) Eat Less but Eat Regularly: When I'm stressed, I tend to "eat" coffee for breakfast, have an apple or banana for lunch, grab fast food for dinner, and have a glass of wine and/or some ice cream before bed. Everything adds up to about 1000 calories -- the minimum anyone should go to stay healthy is 1200.

This means I'm simultaneously starving my body, and filling it with fat, carbs, caffeine, and nothing green in sight. On the opposite end, when I'm bored, I just sort of graze all day. Some fruit here, some chips there, half a frozen pizza -- why not?

My goal for these last few weeks was to aim for around 1500 calories/day of small, regular meals. Oatmeal with fruit for breakfast, soup and a sandwich for lunch, yogurt and nuts for a snack, a healthy dinner (protein, carbs, and veggies), and a small dessert.... That's it. No counting calories, no "forbidden" foods, and no special diet. In fact, I've gone to happy hours and barbecues, and I've baked and eaten brownies. I really haven't changed much, but I've just been more cognizant about what and when I eat (or not).

The grocery store is FULL of 100-calorie snacks: popcorn, crackers, chips, ice cream, mini-cakes.... The trick is to just eat one pack!

2) Move More but Not at the Gym: When people want to lose weight fast, the first place they head is to the gym. They go cardio-crazy or max out on weights.... You can't go from sedentary to Richard Simmons and think your body will respond in a positive way.

Although it's definitely important to have a good exercise routine, you have to be healthy in "normal" ways, too. [Pet Peeve: The person who drives around the parking lot at the gym looking for the spot closest to the door. Hello?! You're going to work out! Who cares if you have to walk 20 more steps to the door!]

I've boosted the effect of the gym with little things -- taking Maggie the long way for our walks, parking at the end of the lot, using the stairs instead of the elevator, and getting a hand basket instead of a cart when I'm picking up a few things in the grocery store.

One of my favorite things to do is to give my car a few days "off." Ann Arbor has a great bus system. With a little planning, I can get from Point A to Point B in about the same time as I would if I'd driven and parked. It doesn't seem like much, but all of this physical activity adds up. By the end of the day, I can literally walk about an extra mile -- sometimes more.

Why, people? Why?!

Even though I was already a healthy weight, making these few changes helped me to reach my goal on the scale and shed a few inches. If I stay within 1-2 pounds of this weight, then my dress should fit perfectly and I'll be able to breathe easy (literally) on October 16th -- less than a month away!

Last week, Lu and I had to totally change our cake. Earlier this week, Lu and I had to change our catering! No worries -- the case isn't as extreme.

Since we're having more guests than we originally anticipated and had to switch up our floor plan, we've decided to have a buffet-style dinner instead of a plated dinner. We also changed around our menu choices -- instead of lamb chops and chicken marsala, we're now having grilled salmon and chicken san francisco.

This was a bonus for us in one area. Since a plated dinner costs more, we were able to apply our credit to hors d'oeuvres for our cocktail hour. However, it was a drawback in another because we have 200 menu cards that are totally useless now. In case you're not Ms. Etiquette, menu cards are only used for a plated dinner, not if you're having a buffet meal.

Luckily, we got our cards printed through Vistaprint, so we spent about $25 max (including taxes and shipping) on printing all of our cards.

I have to give a pitch for Vistaprint. This company is great! We've gotten 200 personalized menu cards (we used regular postcards and designed them ourselves with our menu), 200 advice/wish cards (folded business cards with our own design), 200 return address labels, 200 magnets, 20 sheets of stationary, 3 pens, a tote bag, and a lawn sign to direct people to the reception hall -- all for under $100.

Our advice/wish cards.

The trick to Vistaprint is that they're always having specials. Once you order one item, they send you emails for tons of free stuff. All you have to do is pay for shipping. Granted, they email you nearly everyday with their specials, but Vistaprint is definitely one company that I don't mind being spammed by!

Back to the menu cards: Lu and I loved our menu cards. They pulled in all of the wedding colors, and they added the right amount of "pop" to the tables when you stuck them inside the folded napkin.

They also did double duty. Even though Lu and I plan to be on schedule, we want a way to keep guests occupied in case they have to wait a little longer for us at the reception venue than anticipated. Although the cocktail hour will take up part of the time, guests still might get bored.

Menu cards are an easy way to add to the table and bring in your theme.

So when Lu and I had our menu cards printed, we put some trivia questions about us on the back of the cards. The plan was that the DJ could ask guests trivia questions about us to take up some time if needed. If we were on schedule, then we'd just have questions asked/answered at various intervals throughout the evening.

With the switch in dinner service, we've decided to reprint the cards with the trivia questions on the front and the answers on the back. This way, we'll still have the "look" of menu cards on the table without break any etiquette rules.... Of course, people are going to figure out that the answers are on the back of the card, but it'll still be a fun way to keep guests occupied and hopefully spark some conversation before and during dinner.

Yes, the fact that I'm writing this post means I've finished my thank you cards! I'll be putting them in the mail as soon as I click "Publish."

On September 4th, my sisters -- also my maid and matron of honor -- threw me a bridal shower. Even though I'm the planner in the family, my sisters and cousins did an excellent job with my shower. They even sequestered me in the basement before the party started to make sure I didn't even attempt to help with anything..... They know me so well!

Stuck in the basement and waiting semi-patiently.

The shower was held under a tent in my sister's yard.  It was a gorgeous day, and we started off with mingling, food, and a game. The rules of the game, which continued throughout the evening, stipulated that everyone got a small token (little toasting flutes); but anyone that said the word "bride" had to give up their toasting flutes to the person that caught their slip.

The tent

A creative way to avoid saying "bride."

After we ate, then we moved into the second game, where everyone was given a game booklet and had to match up couples -- everyone from "Fred and Wilma" to "Big and Carrie."

Playing the "Match the Couple" game.

The winner, who matched 15 couples correctly!

Then we immediately moved into the third game, which put me on the spot. I had to answer 20 questions about Lu. He'd written down the answers before the shower, and I got a point if my answer matched his.

The person who won this game had to guess how many questions I'd answer correctly. Many of my relatives thought I'd answer all 20 questions correctly, while the most pessimistic person thought that I'd only be able to answer 12.

In the hot seat!

The questions were tough! I was asked everything from Lu's favorite color (brown), to his most prized possession (his life), to what he wanted to be when he grew up (a carpenter). In the end, Lu's cousin was correct in guessing that I'd be able to answer 18/20 questions correctly.... And no, we did not cheat! :-)

(My favorite question was, "What is your future husband's most embarrassing moment?" After a lot of pause and thought, I said that I thought I knew what it was but that I couldn't share it with everyone. Lu's response to the question, "She knows it, but she better not say it!")

Playing "20 Questions about the Groom."

After games, it was time for gifts. Unlike our couples shower, this was primarily an event just for women, and the gifts reflected this. However, there were a few men present: Jeremy and my brother-in-law served as the photographers, and my dad just kinda crashed the event for the food.... probably to his dismay when it came to this portion of the evening, but I'm getting ahead of myself!

Time for gifts and cards!

For the most part, Lu and I received gifts for us to share: gift cards and monetary gifts, flatware, kitchen items, cookbooks, and books on marriage. These items were definitely appreciated and will certainly help make our individual lives into one.

Reading cards.

Then there were also some gifts that were mostly geared toward me: scented lotions and body wash, a wedding scrapbook, comfortable pajamas, and a Starbucks gift card (or maybe I was supposed to share that one?!).

Our wedding scrapbook :-)

And then there were a few risque gifts: from the mild (a Victoria's Secret gift card), to the amusing (an aphrodisiac cookbook), to the sexy (leopard print lingerie and a pink corset and garter set), to the surprising (a sexy, white nightie picked out by a 70-something woman that goes to my church). Opening these gifts was a lot of fun -- once I got over the "commentary" that came with them. I was not expecting the "Oohhs!", "Aahhs!", the "Hold it up higher!", and my favorite "Turn it around! We want to see the back!"

The Little Black Book of Sex Secrets

Holding up my first nightie gift. What's even funnier than my blushing is my brother-in-law's face in the background!

Then we wrapped up the shower with the obligatory bow hat (which was actually pretty stylish), words of wisdom, and cake.

My tissue paper and bow hat!

A reminder of the meaning of love: 1 Corinthians 13

Cutting my delicious cake!

 As I blogged about previously in my post on our couples shower, the thought of a traditional bridal shower made me nervous: playing embarrassing games, holding up lingerie (or anything sexual) in front of women that I've gone to church with since I was a baby, wearing a hat made of bows, etc.

However, I had an absolutely amazing time. I was so touched by everyone's kindness and generosity -- of course, I cried again thanking everyone. But happy tears are a beautiful thing!

There's nothing sad about happy tears!

Five months ago, I spent the entire day in bed crying.

In college, I'd accepted two scholarships from the government in the total amount of $50,000 in exchange for three years of service after I finished school.... Well, they didn't count on me being in school for 6+ more years!

Even though I was totally transparent with my plans to apply for and attend a PhD program and came back every summer to work, the government wanted me to start full-time in June of this year. If I didn't come back, then fine -- I just owed them $24, 641.38 (the monetary equivalent of my remaining service time).

They told me this in March, and I had to pay in full by June.

I looked at my savings account, I looked at my brokerage account, I looked into getting loans, I applied for fellowships that were a long-shot for me to get, and I even considered borrowing money from friends and family. This still was not enough to cover the debt that I owed.

I was resigned to quit school with about 2 years remaining in my program. I was going to have to uproot my life in Michigan. I was going to have to suffer through a long-distance relationship with Lu. The worst part: This was all for a job that was "fun and exciting" at 19 but work that I dreaded doing at 25.

Defeated, I cried -- all day..... But I also did something else, I prayed. In fact, Lu and I prayed together.



I knew that God wanted me to finish my degree, and I knew that God had put Lu in my life for the purpose of marriage. I just had no idea how He wanted us to get there. After doing everything humanly possible that I could think of, I just had to turn it over to Him.

The first answer to my prayer didn't even involve me directly. Lu was awarded an NSF Fellowship that gave him more money than his regular stipend. Then on the day he proposed, literally on the way to the park where he got down on one knee, I received an email telling me that I was awarded a $10,000 scholarship from our graduate school.

A few days later, I found out that I had access to an account that I thought was blocked. Scraping together my fellowship and exhausting my savings, I walked in to work, wrote a check for the full amount. I was broke, but I was free.


Today, I just made another step toward freedom: Lu and I made the last payment for our wedding, and we are NOT in debt.

I totaled things up and realized that Lu and I have paid over $40,000 in the last five months -- between my debt to the government, everything for the wedding, and furniture for our condo.

The most awesome thing is that I have no idea where it came from, and we have a surplus!

We both got fellowships, we both worked part-time jobs this summer, our parents helped out with about a quarter of the wedding costs, we sold some of our old furniture on Craigslist, and we've received gifts at our bridal showers. This is still nowhere near the amount that we have paid out over the last several months.

All I have to say is that with me free to finish my degree, with the wedding pretty much paid off, and with Lu and I moving forward with savings: We are blessed, and God is good.

I told myself that I wouldn't write a post about my traditional bridal shower in Maryland until I finished the "Thank You" cards. One week later....

With that said, look for a post about the wonderful bridal shower that my sisters threw for me in the next few days (and if you came, look out for a thank you note by the end of the week).

Thanks for your patience, and I hope you're having a great weekend!

If you're spending your Sunday lounging around, then feel free to catch up on some of our previous posts. :-)

Here are three conversations I've had today:

Convo 1
Friend: Hey! How're you?


Me: Exhausted. I've had such a crazy day!


Friend: I completely understand. Things will calm down after the wedding.

Convo 2

Potential Research Advisor: We've got a lot of projects coming up. I think you'd be great to bring on board.


Me: Thanks! I've got a ton on my plate this year. Maybe we can touch base a few times a month and sit down around the middle of next semester to see if you still need me?


Potential Research Advisor: Sounds like a plan! No worries, I completely understand. Things will calm down after the wedding.

Convo 3

Mary Kay Consultant: You have such an outgoing personality. You're a natural salesperson!


Me: I worked in sales before and had a lot of fun, but I'm really not interested in going back into it.


Mary Kay Consultant: I completely understand. We can talk details when things calm down after the wedding!

This was JUST today!!!

I have more going on in my life than the wedding... a lot more.

To my friend: I'm actually running into a wall trying to schedule my prospectus defense. I also went to a meeting this morning about mentoring undergraduate research assistants for the year, moved into my new office, updated my website, arranged meetings and sold three things I posted on Craigslist, called my cheerleaders' mothers to put together a phone chain, and started writing thank you notes for my bridal shower. On top of that, I still have to do some editing and fold laundry.... The wedding was the least of my concerns, but thanks for asking.

To my potential advisor: I said I couldn't meet with you until next semester.... The wedding is 5 weeks away, the middle of next semester is 5 months away. You're smart. Do the math.

To the Mary Kay consultant: Your products are great. However, I've seen too many of my friends waste their time, money, and energy trying to sell Mary Kay. I'm not doing it. Period.

Undoubtedly, some people will be offended by my bluntness and take how I'm feeling the the wrong way. I'm prepared to deal with that. I have tried my best to be candid with you about every aspect of preparing of marriage, and this is something that I've been facing.

To be clear, it's not that I don't want people to ask me about the wedding. I'd love to chat about what's going on, answer questions, and fill you in on any updates. Weddings are fun, weddings are exciting, and they bring you back into contact with old friends and loved ones.

And it's certainly not that I'm unappreciative of your support. I'm grateful to my friends, family, and the random strangers that read my blog.  It has been amazing to document everything going on at this important stage of my life. The writing is therapeutic, the comments make me smile, the suggestions have been great, and I know that I will treasure this blog for years to come.

Just please don't assume that all of my worries and stress involve the wedding. I know that this blog does discuss the wedding and wedding preparation, but keep in mind that this is just one facet of the many sides of my life.

Before I was engaged, I had a full life. After the wedding, I'll still have a full life and have to also consider Lu's wants and needs.

All the stuff that's been pushed to the back burner because of wedding planning? Yeah, that's still there.

Settling in to our new lives? Yep, we'll have to deal with that.

My research, my mentoring, my friendships, my coaching, my editing, and not to mention cooking, cleaning, and taking care of my dog? These things were never put on pause!

I know that many of you come from a good place, but I'm still the same active, involved, busy Ashley now that I was before I was "Ashley the bride." Wedding or not, that won't change anytime soon.

With that being said, if you'd like me to start a blog about political science, coaching cheerleading, or being a free-lance editor after October 16, then that's always an option!

There are all kinds of insurance available these days, even my dog has insurance! One type of insurance that I would stongly encourage any engaged/married couple to invest in is protection for their rings.

Lu definitely made a great choice for my engagement ring. The design is unique and beautiful. (It looks like a flower.) I've gotten lots of compliments during these past five months, and I've grown quite attached to it.

Unfortunately,  while the ring is dainty and delicate, I am not.

In a few hours, my ring will look just like new again!

In the last week, between visiting DC, rearranging my condo, and just living life, I broke a few of the prongs in the setting and two smaller diamonds surrounding the center stone fell out. It's not extremely noticeable, but it's a big deal to me.

I was concerned about how much money and time it would take to get it fixed. Luckily, Lu was smart enough to get the ring covered by a great insurance plan that provides two years of coverage for normal wear and tear, as well as lifetime protection for my diamonds. With this plan, I was able to take my ring directly to a jeweler about 30 minutes away from home, and he's rebuilding the setting and putting in new diamonds as I type!

It's actually a good thing that the diamonds fell out because there is one clause for most protection plans: you have to get your ring checked every so often for it to stay insured. For some plans (like mine), I have to get my ring inspected every six months. However, others require you to come in every four months to make sure that the setting is secure. It can be a pain, but the jeweler also cleans the ring while you're waiting to make it sparkle like new.

With planning the wedding and living life, "get ring checked" slipped further and further down my to do list.  The jeweler made it clear to me that while many stores are a bit lenient with their policy, slacking on inspections does technically void the insurance protection. Get one salesperson having a bad day, and....

From now on, I'm going to set a reminder in my calendar to get this done!

WE'RE GOING WITH COTTON'S GOURMET!!!!!

I got an email from Gary (the director of hospitality at our reception venue) yesterday, and I just got off the phone with Cotton confirming our switch in bakers. :-)

The design consultation with Cotton was totally different than with our previous baker. At the first bakeshop, the consultation was really detailed. We talked about cake shape, cake flavors, what color cake we wanted, she wanted to see pictures of cake designs we were considering, she took pictures of the bouquet, and I even gave her fabric swatches of the dress. I was definitely confident that she'd make a great cake for us -- mostly because we pretty much designed the whole thing.

This time, things were different. We discussed the theme of the wedding, my dress, our flowers/boutonnieres, how much color we wanted on the cake, and any details that we liked. Cotton took notes, and is going to just go with it.

And you know what? My micro-managing, detail-oriented, "Can we please also document this conversation in an email?" self is totally fine with her taking the lead!

I'm a big fan of shows like Cake Boss, so I'm excited to get my own big reveal. With Mrs. Oliver, I think I would've have been more worried about the cake being "exactly the way we discussed." With Cotton, I'm looking forward to seeing what she puts together. I know it'll be colorful, I know it'll be vintage, and I think it'll have some feathers. We'll see!

Cotton is also going to do our Spelman/Morehouse/UMich groom's cake for the rehearsal dinner, so that will be like our "preview" of the next day.

Now the hard part, which flavors to choose?! (Yes, yes. Sweet potato will definitely be one!)

The wedding package that Lu and I booked through the Atrium came with a baker that we loved. In June, we did our cake tasting and were totally wowed by the choices and creativity. We checked another item off of our to do list and moved on.

.... Or so we thought. When we contacted our baker, Mrs. Oliver, to let her know that we'd be having closer to 165 guests, she told us that the cake that came with our package was for 100 people and that we'd be charged $200+ to add servings to our cake.

We told her that he hadn't been informed of that when we signed the contract. Sorry, but that was the agreement with the Atrium.

We asked about having a less elaborate cake that served more people. No.

We asked about having a two-tier cake instead. No.

Time out.

When we signed our contract, we were told that the cost for each additional guest over the 100 people that the package covered was $16. Apparently, this cost was just for catering -- not for the cake. But since every guest wants a piece of wedding cake (even if they don't eat the whole thing), we contacted Gary and let him know the situation.

We asked what he could do about this unexpected expense. If nothing, then we suggested that he raise the package price to an extra $20/guest for future brides. (When you're signing a contract for $11,500, an extra $200 is nothing. When you're eight weeks away from the date, every penny counts!)

Gary immediately apologized and recommended another baker, Cotton's Gourmet, and promised that her cakes were delicious. Within 20 minutes of receiving the email response from Gary, I got a call from Cotton.

Cotton was professional and courteous, and she had that "old friend" quality about her. We talked about the wedding, we talked about flavors, and she insured us that she could do a cake for 165 people plus an anniversary cake for us. I was so happy about Cotton that we set up a tasting for the following weekend.

Then I went home, looked at her website... and fell in love. Not only were her cakes beautiful and unique (no cookie-cutter, one-size-fits-all design), but her flavors sounded amazing: sweet potato poundcake, caramel apple, chocolate, hazelnut, pina colada, peachy keen, almond poppyseed -- and the list goes on. We were so excited to meet Cotton and have our tasting.

One of Cotton's fall-themed cakes with a coordinating anniversary cake. How cute is that?!

One problem: By this point, our initial baker had decided that she could do the cake for 160 people at no extra charge after all.  Gary told us that he would prefer it if we stuck with Mrs. Oliver since she'd decided to be accommodating, even if it was belated, but he would definitely just swallow any cancellation fees if we went with Cotton.

Gary's been great, so we didn't want to saddle him with an extra fee. We also definitely enjoyed our initial tasting with Mrs. Oliver, and we'd already had our menu cards printed. It just made more sense to stick with her and maybe just use one of Cotton's cakes for our rehearsal dinner the night before.

That is, until we had our tasting.

Lu and I changed our mind almost immediately after taking the first bite of Cotton's sweet potato poundcake. We literally devoured four cupcakes in five minutes -- including one flavor called Wacky Tacky Watermelon. (Who would've thought a watermelon cake would be so good?!)

The carrot cake was amazing, the strawberries and cream was delicious, and the sweet potato poundcake was quite possibly the best cake that I've ever had in my life. And trust me, I've had a whole lot of cake!

We were so impressed with Cotton's cake and her attitude -- so accommodating and down-to-earth -- that we called her back to thank her again for how delicious everything was, and we decided that we wanted her to do our wedding cake.

But we found out that Gary had already sent a check for our wedding cake to Mrs. Oliver. :-(

We're hoping -- more like praying really hard -- that the check can be applied to another Atrium client's bill, and that Cotton will be the baker for our wedding. She's absolutely amazing as both a baker and as a person.

Who cares if we have to get our menu cards reprinted?! We just have to share her dessert with as many people as possible.

Now that I have my dress and my veils, I need to decide what I'm going to do with my hair. I have really thick, shoulder-length, curly hair.

The great thing about my hair is that it's really versatile. In the last week (yep, 7 days), my hair has gone from this:

Wild and Fun

....to this:

Natural but a lil' more tame

... to this:

A pretty roller set

... to this:

Sleek bun

 to this!

Straight with a few curls at the end

While it might seem that I have a lot of options for the wedding, the problem is that my hair can easily turn into this:

NOOOOO!

It might seem that the easiest option is to wear my hair up and/or back the day of the wedding, but that doesn't tame the frizzies either. I could easily end up with a crown of flyaways. *sigh*

I've considered getting a Keratin smoothing treatment before the wedding. The Keratin treatment relaxes the curl, conditions the hair (no crazy chemicals), and will leave my hair frizz-free, silky,  shiny, and almost straight. The Keratin treatment is supposed to work for all races, ethnicities, and hair types. The best part? In 4-6 months, I'll have my curls back!

Latina hair before and after a Keratin treatment

My only worry is that the Keratin treatment is new and seems too good to be true. I've researched it online and talked to people who've had it done.

A friend-of-a-friend told me, "It literally changed my life. I can go to the gym, I can go swimming, and I don't have to worry about my hair. It's not like a regular relaxer at all.... I can tell you some crazy stories about those! But I really have nothing negative to say about the Keratin treatment."

Then I looked online and saw horror stories about people who lost hair using the treatment -- as in hair falling out. I'm not sure if these people had it done professionally or not, but it's still scary.

With six weeks before the wedding, I'm not sure if I want to make any drastic changes. At the same time, I don't want to turn into a frizzball before the reception. Decisions, decisions.....

I had my first dress fitting on Tuesday, and I just have four words: those darn 3 lbs!!!

About a month and a half ago, I blogged about how I'd gained a few pounds, and I was worried that this was starting a trend and my wedding gown wouldn't fit.

The good news is that I'm back to my original pre-summer-gorging weight, settling in at 130 on the scale.

The bad news is that this puts me in the same spot that I was in May. I have a gorgeous dress that fits almost perfectly, except that I can't completely breathe in it. *sigh*

Alright, let's take a step back and tell you about my fitting. I got my dress at David's Bridal and decided to also have the alterations done there.

I walked in, a sales consultant escorted me to the back of the shop, a seamstress asked me to change, I put on my dress and my shoes, walked out, and then:

"Beautiful dress! Wow -- great choice for your body," said the tiny, Greek seamstress to me.

"Thanks! Can you zip me up?"

"Not a problem.... Beautiful! (clearly this is one of her favorite adjectives) Now where to start? Where to start?" she muttered to herself more than me.

Then we run through the checklist:

"Hem? Yes, we definitely need a hem. I'll pin you at the end. Beautiful shoes. How much do you want them to show? We do an inch off the ground normally -- they'll peek a bit when you walk, but that's why you get fun shoes. Right? I can do shorter or longer if you prefer."

I agreed to stick to the standards 1" hem.

"Straps? Look good. Feel too tight? Too loose?"

I shake my head to indicate they were fine.

"Bust. Great fit, but a slight gap near the shoulders. I'll pin that. You want bra cups? Your groom might like a little more oomph."

We both laughed, and I tried on the bra cups. The little "oomph" was more like a "yowza," so I steered away from those.

"Back and waist. Also very nice fit there."

At this point I chimed in, "Well, it's actually not the most comfortable. It feels a little tight after a few minutes."

"Does it hurt?"

"No, not really. But I can definitely feel it, you know?"

"Well, let me see if I can let out a little bit. (Does some adjustments with little strips of fabric.) How does that feel?"

"Much better."

"Hmm, well, I only made it looser by 1/2" -- almost nothing. When's your wedding?"

"October 16."

"Oh! October. Oh, yes. You have plenty of time to make it fit on your own. Skip some bread a few times a week, and save yourself $65."

"So I have to lose weight?" *sigh*

"No! Well, yes..... But just a little bit. If you lose more thaaannnn -- (gives me a once-over look) -- maybe 5 lbs, then it won't work. The back will not fit as nice, the chest will be baggy, the hem will be too long.... Just 3-5 lbs. should do it.... Yes, that would be perfect."

"Alright.... I can do that."

We then moved on to my hips, which weren't an issue given the cut of my dress. Then she went to work pinning the hem of the dress, and I was on my way.

Side note: Pinning the hem of a wedding dress takes forever! It took almost half an hour to adjust the different layers and fix the train. I was not expecting that.

Back to the issue at hand, this means that I really have to get serious about losing these last few pounds.

I know, I know. Some brides are on a mission to lose 15, 20, or even 50 pounds before their wedding. I should be grateful that I just need to lose a few.

But that's even harder to do!  I have to be strict with my diet, but not too strict. I have to ramp up my exercise, but not overdo it. I have to avoid mindless snacking, but it's okay to still give into the occasional indulgence. Losing less than a pound a week means that I have to mostly stick to my routine... but not quite.

Worst case scenario, I can wear some Spanx and call it a day. However, this is my last resort. (See #5 on my "Beauty is Pain?" post last month.)

We'll see what kind of progress I've made at my next fitting -- three weeks away!

This is going to be a short post because I'm about to begin a(nother) very busy week/weekend. I'm actually writing this in Chick-fil-a in Maryland on the go. Gotta love Chick-fil-a!!

Hopefully, I can check in with some updates. If not, this is what my schedule looks like:

-- Today: Get our marriage license!!!
-- Tomorrow: Conference
-- Friday: Conference & Jeremy comes to DC
-- Saturday: Cake Tasting, Dinner with Pastor & Assigned Mentor Couple
-- Sunday: Church and Bridal Shower
-- Monday: Catch up on all the work that I'll undoubtedly be behind on doing, and head back to Michigan!

I'll update you when I can. Pray that I keep my patience, schedule, and sanity. :-)