Lu and I are celebrating 10 months of marriage today!
While this is a happy occasion for us, more than one person has said, "Wow. You really count months of marriage? That's... cute."
I'm never quite sure how to react to this response. No, we haven't been together for any major milestones, however I personally think every month, every week, and even every day that you spend with the person you love is something to celebrate.
Nonetheless, expressing love is apparently not normal -- or only normal in a certain context: Just started a relationship? Snuggling is totally acceptable. Just got engaged? Walking arm in arm makes sense. Newlyweds? Of course you can kiss in public. Been together for more than 35 years?! Then you can do whatever the heck you want!
But what about the people who are happy in their relationships just because they're happy in their relationships? What's our "excuse" for minor PDAs?
Last week, one of my Facebook friends put up a status message about how he can't stand when couples sit on the same side of the booth at a restaurant because it "looks codependent."
... Over a dozen people liked this status message. Really?! When did people become so bitter that seeing others who look content - or God-forbid - genuinely enjoying time with their significant other bothers them?
One of his friends commented that she didn't care how it looked because between work and dealing with her kids, she didn't have the time to express her love for her husband the way she wants to. If all she can get is a few minutes of shoulder touching at a restaurant, then she's going to take advantage of it.
I totally sympathize with this point. Call us codependent or say that this is just the "newlywed phase," I make no apologies for any of the romantic things that I do.
While this is a happy occasion for us, more than one person has said, "Wow. You really count months of marriage? That's... cute."
I'm never quite sure how to react to this response. No, we haven't been together for any major milestones, however I personally think every month, every week, and even every day that you spend with the person you love is something to celebrate.
I've noticed that more and more people tend to be turned off by romance and/or romantic gestures. Lu and I always get at least one side glance when we walk down the street holding hands or if one of us gives the other person a bite to eat from our plate at a restaurant. It's not like we're making out or feeding each other, we're just being normal.
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| Who doesn't love sharing dessert? |
Nonetheless, expressing love is apparently not normal -- or only normal in a certain context: Just started a relationship? Snuggling is totally acceptable. Just got engaged? Walking arm in arm makes sense. Newlyweds? Of course you can kiss in public. Been together for more than 35 years?! Then you can do whatever the heck you want!
But what about the people who are happy in their relationships just because they're happy in their relationships? What's our "excuse" for minor PDAs?
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| Lu and I are actually still this happy 10 months later -- without the car, the tux, or the dress. |
... Over a dozen people liked this status message. Really?! When did people become so bitter that seeing others who look content - or God-forbid - genuinely enjoying time with their significant other bothers them?
One of his friends commented that she didn't care how it looked because between work and dealing with her kids, she didn't have the time to express her love for her husband the way she wants to. If all she can get is a few minutes of shoulder touching at a restaurant, then she's going to take advantage of it.
I totally sympathize with this point. Call us codependent or say that this is just the "newlywed phase," I make no apologies for any of the romantic things that I do.
Besides, in 34 years and 2 months, all of the things that are perceived as annoying now will be cute again -- like our matching track suits.
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| If you don't think THIS is cute, please seek professional help. |
I think this is spot on. I also don't believe in judging other people's love. For example, I personally like to sit across from the hubby when we're at a restaurant because I feel it's much easier to make eye contact while conversing (unless there's 3+ people in the booth). But, I don't knock the people who do. Everyone has their own "comfortable" level of romance. Who is anyone to judge anyone else's?
Exactly! It's like saying that couples who don't hold hands and cuddle aren't in love. That doesn't even make sense! There aren't any "rules" of romance. The way you express your feelings is personal.