~* Ash *~
Probably not the title you'd expect for my first post-honeymoon blog, huh?
Before I go into the amazing time that Lu and I had exploring Costa Rica's beaches, rain forest, and coffee plantations, I just have to vent a little about people who say things like:
1) "Spring Break? Is that why there are fewer undergrads around? I don't even pay attention to stuff like that anymore!"
2) "Don't shake my hand. I'm still recovering from the flu. I should probably be in bed right now!"
3) "Man, I've only gotten 4 hours of sleep this week. I've been studying/working/writing/in the lab the whole time."
4) "Professor/Boss, I don't mean to interrupt, but you're wrong because..."
5) "I rarely eat breakfast, and I don't take lunch breaks. If I eat at all, it's at my desk."
I'll admit. At some point or another, I've probably made comments like these. There are still times when I skip lunch, don't get my full 8 hours of sleep, pointedly question my advisors, take work with me on "vacations," and just generally don't operate at 100%.
The difference is that these are not the norm for me, and I do not wear them as my badge of honor. I still try to respect my body and other people whenever I can. Let's look at these comments again in a different way:
1a) What Is Said: "Spring Break? Is that why there fewer undergrads around? I don't even pay attention to breaks anymore."
1b.) What The Speaker Means: "I piss on all of you lowly people that are not as dedicated to scholarly pursuits as me." [Sorry for the vulgarity. It just kinda fits.]
1c.) What I Hear: "I either have no life, or my life sucks so badly that I have to make a joke out of not even noticing that everyone else is about to have a great time -- even though I teach or take classes and clearly have seen the academic calendar -- to feel better about myself."
2a.)What Is Said: "Don't shake my hand. I'm still recovering from the flu. I should probably be in bed right now!"
2b.) What Is Meant: "My job is the most important thing in my life. How could I let some wimpy illness keep me away?"
2c.) What I Hear: "I'm such a narrow-minded workaholic. In fact, I'm willing to infect all of you and lower overall productivity just to get in one assignment that nobody cares about in the long-run."
3a.) What Is Said: "Man, I've only gotten 4 hours of sleep this week. I've been studying/working/writing/in the lab the whole time."
3b.) What Is Meant: "I'm important and necessary. I can't let something as silly as sleep keep me down."
3c.) What I Hear: "I'm stupid enough to deprive my body of a basic need... probably due to my own lack of planning and/or procrastination."
4a.) What Is Said: "Professor/Boss, I don't mean to interrupt, but you're wrong because..."
4b.) What Is Meant: "I'm totally qualified to do your job, and improve on areas where you're weak. Don't I have so much promise?"
4c.) What I Hear: "Look at me! Look at me! Of course I meant to interrupt because I'm not only a showoff, but I'm also rude."
5a.) What Is Said: "I don't take lunch breaks. If I eat at all, it's at my desk."
5b.) What Is Meant: "I am a loyal employee who maximizes my value."
5c.) What I Hear: "I have no friends." Or (hopefully) "I'm clocking out an hour early, SUCKAHS!!!"
My first year of grad school, I almost fell into this trap. I vividly remember a conversation where people were comparing how many hours of sleep they had the night before an important assignment. Some people said four, others countered with three, and one guy topped everyone with two hours of sleep in the computer lab. My peers looked at him with something akin to reverence.
As for me? I actually finished the assignment the previous afternoon and went to bed early. Heck, I even cooked dinner and took my dog on an extended walk. Of course, I didn't dare say this for fear of seeming inadequate or like a slacker.
But wait -- what if I was an inadequate slacker?! My anxiety was soon assuaged when I received the second highest grade on the final exam in the aforementioned class and a great GPA for the semester.
This isn't to brag or say that I'm a genius. And it certainly isn't to say that I'm always the most organized, or even punctual, person when it comes to meeting deadlines. I just realize that there's no embarrassment in actually enjoying life. Breaks are not only good for you, but they're necessary to help you regroup and refocus.
During one of my summer internships, my boss's boss -- a father of two who had been working with the company for 15 years -- was being chided for taking too many days off. Aware of the office gossip, he posted a cartoon of an elderly man wearing a tropical shirt with his head on his desk... dead. The most interesting part of the cartoon was that his secretary was still putting papers on his desk, as she said, "It's a shame Bill never got to take that vacation to Hawaii."
Basically, when you die, there will still be things in your inbox. Meaning that the world not only can go on without you, but it will go on without you. If death is forever, do you really think a week's vacation or a few sick days will be that catastrophic? Just pause, and think about that for a second.
I won't always have the time to take an entire week off. Take the wedding for example, Lu and I waited four months to have a "real" honeymoon because of our schedules. The point is that we still had one, and we looked forward to it.
I strongly believe that everyone needs a break. If not a week, then a long weekend, an overnight trip, or even a few hours to relax. The people that I look up to the most are productive in their careers and still manage to spend time with their families, have hobbies, and even volunteer. In fact, the people that I feel sorry for are the ones who don't seem to have a life outside of their jobs.
Sure, sometimes you will just have to do grunt work for hours and hours on end. However, for the most part, it's not the hours you work but how productive you are in those hours. Are you really working the whole time? Or are you staring off into space? Perhaps chit-chatting with co-workers? Reading news articles? And don't even get me started on Facebook....
Okay, my apologies for the extended vent (and to the people I've undoubtedly offended). Honeymoon post soon!!! :-)
Before I go into the amazing time that Lu and I had exploring Costa Rica's beaches, rain forest, and coffee plantations, I just have to vent a little about people who say things like:
1) "Spring Break? Is that why there are fewer undergrads around? I don't even pay attention to stuff like that anymore!"
2) "Don't shake my hand. I'm still recovering from the flu. I should probably be in bed right now!"
3) "Man, I've only gotten 4 hours of sleep this week. I've been studying/working/writing/in the lab the whole time."
4) "Professor/Boss, I don't mean to interrupt, but you're wrong because..."
5) "I rarely eat breakfast, and I don't take lunch breaks. If I eat at all, it's at my desk."
I'll admit. At some point or another, I've probably made comments like these. There are still times when I skip lunch, don't get my full 8 hours of sleep, pointedly question my advisors, take work with me on "vacations," and just generally don't operate at 100%.
The difference is that these are not the norm for me, and I do not wear them as my badge of honor. I still try to respect my body and other people whenever I can. Let's look at these comments again in a different way:
1a) What Is Said: "Spring Break? Is that why there fewer undergrads around? I don't even pay attention to breaks anymore."
1b.) What The Speaker Means: "I piss on all of you lowly people that are not as dedicated to scholarly pursuits as me." [Sorry for the vulgarity. It just kinda fits.]
1c.) What I Hear: "I either have no life, or my life sucks so badly that I have to make a joke out of not even noticing that everyone else is about to have a great time -- even though I teach or take classes and clearly have seen the academic calendar -- to feel better about myself."
2a.)What Is Said: "Don't shake my hand. I'm still recovering from the flu. I should probably be in bed right now!"
2b.) What Is Meant: "My job is the most important thing in my life. How could I let some wimpy illness keep me away?"
2c.) What I Hear: "I'm such a narrow-minded workaholic. In fact, I'm willing to infect all of you and lower overall productivity just to get in one assignment that nobody cares about in the long-run."
3a.) What Is Said: "Man, I've only gotten 4 hours of sleep this week. I've been studying/working/writing/in the lab the whole time."
3b.) What Is Meant: "I'm important and necessary. I can't let something as silly as sleep keep me down."
3c.) What I Hear: "I'm stupid enough to deprive my body of a basic need... probably due to my own lack of planning and/or procrastination."
4a.) What Is Said: "Professor/Boss, I don't mean to interrupt, but you're wrong because..."
4b.) What Is Meant: "I'm totally qualified to do your job, and improve on areas where you're weak. Don't I have so much promise?"
4c.) What I Hear: "Look at me! Look at me! Of course I meant to interrupt because I'm not only a showoff, but I'm also rude."
5a.) What Is Said: "I don't take lunch breaks. If I eat at all, it's at my desk."
5b.) What Is Meant: "I am a loyal employee who maximizes my value."
5c.) What I Hear: "I have no friends." Or (hopefully) "I'm clocking out an hour early, SUCKAHS!!!"
My first year of grad school, I almost fell into this trap. I vividly remember a conversation where people were comparing how many hours of sleep they had the night before an important assignment. Some people said four, others countered with three, and one guy topped everyone with two hours of sleep in the computer lab. My peers looked at him with something akin to reverence.
As for me? I actually finished the assignment the previous afternoon and went to bed early. Heck, I even cooked dinner and took my dog on an extended walk. Of course, I didn't dare say this for fear of seeming inadequate or like a slacker.
But wait -- what if I was an inadequate slacker?! My anxiety was soon assuaged when I received the second highest grade on the final exam in the aforementioned class and a great GPA for the semester.
This isn't to brag or say that I'm a genius. And it certainly isn't to say that I'm always the most organized, or even punctual, person when it comes to meeting deadlines. I just realize that there's no embarrassment in actually enjoying life. Breaks are not only good for you, but they're necessary to help you regroup and refocus.
During one of my summer internships, my boss's boss -- a father of two who had been working with the company for 15 years -- was being chided for taking too many days off. Aware of the office gossip, he posted a cartoon of an elderly man wearing a tropical shirt with his head on his desk... dead. The most interesting part of the cartoon was that his secretary was still putting papers on his desk, as she said, "It's a shame Bill never got to take that vacation to Hawaii."
Basically, when you die, there will still be things in your inbox. Meaning that the world not only can go on without you, but it will go on without you. If death is forever, do you really think a week's vacation or a few sick days will be that catastrophic? Just pause, and think about that for a second.
I won't always have the time to take an entire week off. Take the wedding for example, Lu and I waited four months to have a "real" honeymoon because of our schedules. The point is that we still had one, and we looked forward to it.
I strongly believe that everyone needs a break. If not a week, then a long weekend, an overnight trip, or even a few hours to relax. The people that I look up to the most are productive in their careers and still manage to spend time with their families, have hobbies, and even volunteer. In fact, the people that I feel sorry for are the ones who don't seem to have a life outside of their jobs.
Sure, sometimes you will just have to do grunt work for hours and hours on end. However, for the most part, it's not the hours you work but how productive you are in those hours. Are you really working the whole time? Or are you staring off into space? Perhaps chit-chatting with co-workers? Reading news articles? And don't even get me started on Facebook....
Okay, my apologies for the extended vent (and to the people I've undoubtedly offended). Honeymoon post soon!!! :-)
